Hi Counselor,
I am facing a challenging situation in my marriage, and I am seeking your guidance and support to help me navigate through it.
I got married at the age of 18, immediately after completing my senior high school education. Initially, I had reservations about marrying at such a young age, but as a Muslim and the only child of my parents, I felt compelled to honor their wishes. My mother had experienced a series of miscarriages and wanted to see her grandchildren before she passed away, and she feared that I might face the same difficulties with conceiving.
I married a man in his early 30s, and I had never been in a serious relationship before our marriage. In the beginning, our marriage was beautiful, and my husband was incredibly sweet, making me fall deeply in love with him. However, over time, things began to change.
About a year into our marriage, my husband started displaying controlling behavior. He became a dictator in our home, making decisions for me without my input. He restricted my freedom, forbidding me from going out, visiting friends, or even seeing my immediate family. He even controlled my interactions, choosing who I could communicate with, especially when it came to male friends. He prevented me from attending weddings or social events, including those of my friends who had attended our wedding.
I have not given him any reason to doubt my loyalty or commitment to our marriage, yet he treats me as if I have no agency or independence. While he hasn't been physically abusive, the emotional toll this control has taken on me is immense. I have reached out to his friends, family, and other significant people in our lives, hoping they could talk to him about his behavior, but it hasn't resulted in any positive changes.
At times, he even goes to the extreme of taking away my cell phone to prevent me from seeking help or support. I've threatened divorce, but it doesn't seem to deter him. Now, I am six months pregnant, and I am deeply concerned about my mental health and the well-being of our child.
Counselor, I am at a loss for how to handle this situation. I desperately need your guidance and advice on what steps I should take to protect myself and my unborn child. Please, help me find a way forward.
Thank you for taking the time to read my message, and I look forward to any guidance you can provide.
Comments